This Is a Perfect Place

by Short Answers

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about

credits

released 02 December 2014

Hypergiant Records 2014

Written, recorded, and produced by us.

Additional vocals on "Midway" by Deborah Newberry.

Additional vocals on "Don't Ever Tell Anybody Anything" by Mike Dooley, Nic Greer, Deborah Newberry, and Emily Resner, sans pants.

With thanks to Kaden Valdivieso, Heather Timm, Anthony Pultz, Kyle Lonczak, Jacquelyn Duley and Akhil Patel.

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Track Name: Letdown
I was new
I was born, given cheap gin, and laid in the crib
As I drank from a chipped mug and felt it in my blood
And when I became this neurotic portrait of post-adolescence,
I figured I should stay for a while, for old time's sake
And find someone to blame

I came here for answers, and I guess I got them
Still chasing after what I thought I wanted

I guess this was my own mistake
Chasing a promise you said that you'd never break
I'm chasing pieces of what you said - just disappointment

I walked home alone
Through a sea of thoughts that were wasted on me
I thought I'd let you know that I tried my best
But everyone's fake, vain, selfish and full of shame
A flame that will burn out again
Fake, vain, selfish and I'm to blame
Because you know that I was just the same

I guess this was my own mistake
Chasing a promise you said that you'd never break
I'm chasing pieces of what you said - just broken pieces
Track Name: Redwood Seeds
I’m not sure whether September brings out myself
Or drowns it in colors, in barren branches
I’m shedding my leaves

I used to welcome the rain
I used to long for the Pacific Northwest
I used to do my best to grow out of this
And feel like I serve some purpose

I crawl up the washed out hillside
Just to be alone, to clear my mind
To just forget the fear of always being in the way
To be too far to hear the noise or see the light of day

In three years, I’ll still be standing here
Still breathing the same air that froze my lungs
Still drinking to thaw them and come undone
And I know the seasons are so rare in this place
And yet I blame the cold for the way that I feel today
So hollow and misplaced
A fear that I can’t face my own mistakes

I’m tying myself around your wrist
So don’t let me drift away
I lie to myself to deal with this
And wonder why things don’t change
Track Name: LHR
Every year it gets harder to start a conversation with you
Distance apart grows farther, I can't see who you are anymore
I've become blind to you, but the look on your face that day forever stays

I've become blind to you, but my memory still holds onto our youth

Still there's a wall between the two of us and it seems to me
That the dreams we once believed we needed-- have become dreams defeated
I'll let this fall apart

What can I say? Is it even worth the words?
There's nothing left for me, I guess I just need to breathe

I'll let go, I'll go home. I'll forget all of this
You'll stay here, and pretend that everything's still perfect
Track Name: Pocket Knife
You said, “We could talk and drink about it,”
“You can tell me what was wrong with everything,”
“How I’m exactly what you need,”
But our ideas of need are two completely different things
Excuse my expectations, because I’m not what you need

And this is not where I should be
I’m growing out of the photograph – your favorite one of me
And this won’t mean a thing to me three years from now
I’m growing out of all this need

I’m the lonely seed of a redwood tree
Afraid of drying out, or maybe cutting myself down
With no one around to hear the sound
Of my head smashed against the ground

And I’ll see you all again
In the void where we’re not sure if we’re still friends
Or faces that just remember something less
You wanted to talk to someone
Who was less afraid of something new
Who wouldn’t know this wasn’t you
“...and I’ll see you around...”
That’s what we always say
And I dread that day
Track Name: Photographs
Shoulders pinned down to the floor
By gravity and lack of sleep
I couldn't ask for more than what you told me
And it's the only thing I get

As I drift across these helpless thoughts
As my mind sticks pins in itself
I'm breaking everything down again
I'm losing everything now

I've seen people my age
All those people who stayed inside those walls they've built
And this won't change
I'm not any different from them -- Just my first-person illusion
Do we really know anyone, anyway?
Does this really matter anyway?

The storm had hit with words you said
So I buried my heart in the snow
I prayed for spring as these days fled
And my insides forever are cold
Still you spoke, your voice so soft
"Let me take you away, you'll be free"
As I awoke, immediately, it was only me
It was only a dream

Though even dreams fade with passing days
It seems my only escape is to just lay awake

The past is a photograph, one that I never planned to keep
As I lie here staring skyward, I swore I'd never fall asleep

You said you'd take me away and I'd be free
I can't distinguish dreams from reality
Track Name: Midway
I hear they say that this is a perfect place
Muse on the weather and dilate their eyes
To take in the landscape while it burns in my mind
And these days, I think I only plan to stay
Just out of habit and tired ways
That make me feel like a mistake on broken legs

And I’m afraid – that’s the most honest thing I can say
This place is a shell I can’t break, just like the character I play
Every single day

With passing days, you learn to be numb or enjoy the pain
Track Name: I'm Scared That I Am
It’s getting colder – it scares me to death
I’m getting older and learning regret
As I drink from the bottle just to settle my head
I’m setting fire to my insides and all that’s left
I’m asking myself where I’ll go when the pond freezes over
I’m southbound on a broken wing, with all the blame to shoulder

And snow sounds nice in the middle of July
To bury my house in the frostbitten dreams we talked about

The same script – I’m reading it over and over
I get uneasy because sometimes I get the feeling I was right

I guess they told me this wouldn’t be easy
I guess they told me I’d burn out eventually
I guess they told me so
Track Name: Cave
My head flips the room when I’m in my bed
I wake up sick and confused again
And what kills me is that my best nights of sleep
I’m too gone to lie awake and think

I’m half asleep, I’m quietly sinking into my room again
Like a blood stain, a pool beneath my head, I’m set in

I’m not coming out

It’s nothing new – it’s constant fear this side of you
Could be made better with a drink or two
You panic like you always do
And I wear a mask, but after this long, you don’t call it that
When all you do is put on an act, it’s just a fact

Empty me out
Put me on display on a shelf in your house
Shatter me on the ground
Let my insides pour out
Does it make you proud?
Track Name: Weighted
You're sunshine, rays of let come set me free
But you're sinking into the sea

This dark winter air, it comes around, cloaks my head
And it's holding close, and hollowing out my skull

This came as a surprise to me, and I don't know what to think
All along I was making excuses, claiming impossibility

I've waded through these tides for too long

I'm moving on to other songs
Track Name: Always Remembered As
Tell me, what would you think if I just stopped to say,
"I wish I could rewrite this character I play"
Because I've lost all the things that would have kept me sane
I traded my insides to avert all this pain

That's the point when you speak, you'll stay calm as you state,
"This was never your part, you've been stuck in back-stage"
Or maybe you'd just agree, remark,
"It's such a shame, you traded your best friends for the lead role again"

I'm placing myself on walls, and I'm putting myself at fault
If you knew me by name, you'd know I've never been myself at all
I've become a fixture--a rose-red mirror
It's become clear that I can't stay here anymore

In between these days I've spent have been the dreams I can't forget
After these years I can't remember all the times I'm forced to let you go
You should know, I've come so close -- but it doesn't make a difference

You know I tried my best to forget all I've witnessed
I know you, you wouldn't let me stray
And I accept the fact that I can't take back anything I say

In between these days I've spent have been the dreams I can't forget
After these years I can't remember all the times I'm forced to let you go
You should know, I've come so close to throwing it all away

Maybe I'll do that someday, but until then I'm forced to stay
Track Name: Don't Ever Tell Anybody Anything
New again, but no one’s here to pull me through this
Just blindly grab at the thought of it,
Swallow the pins I stuck myself with, and start again
Where have I been?
I’m here again, asking myself where the time went
Watching the world spin, and stare until it makes me sick
And everyone around me returns that stare with a lack of care
So unaware of the mess in the kid that’s always just there

I’ve been asleep for three years
Drowning in dreams of losing my teeth
And feeling the sun burn away my grief
While I let the clouds just keep raining on me

But I try my best to hide that I
Feel so lost and can’t help but still think that
Everyone else is where I should be
That everyone is doing better than me
Everyone is doing better than me

And I can’t leave
I’m terrified of uncertainty
And these impossible dreams
Are what I know and what I think make me

You say that it’s over, you say you’re ready to move on
But you’ll miss everything as soon as you’re gone
As soon as you spend the first night alone
Between empty walls
Shaking ‘cause you’ve never known
How cold it is this far from home
And now this is home...
And now this is home...
And now this is home...
And now it’s time to